Sit with Discomfort to Shift into the New You
We know when we feel good, when we are happy and carefree. But we don’t always know when we feel badly, except by tapping into or focusing on our discomfort. The longer we live with discomfort, the more obvious to us it becomes. And the longer our discomfort is lived, the more entrenched and painful it can be to us.
This has been a phenomenal year of discomforts—ours and others. It’s not over yet. With all this discomfort bouncing around in the world, it is important to find ways to identify it, feel it and—given enough time—resolve it. Today I’m sharing reflection questions and two special meditations to help you on your way.
Connect to Your Crown
The body is our ‘feedback’ system that shows us through symptoms what is going on internally and energetically. Discomfort can express as sleep issues. Some people have full blown insomnia, which is extreme difficulty sleeping. Energetically this shows up as trouble falling asleep, or trouble staying asleep and waking not feeling rested. Both are imbalances of the crown chakra.
Energetic issues are hints at deeper process issues and the crown chakra is where we connect to our higher self, the Divine or the big picture of our human lives. It can be where you gather insight and clarity to the higher truths of how you are feeling.
What is the meaning for you of what is happening in the world right now?
What is the meaning in your personal life?
How has it impacted achievement of your dreams and goals?
Is there a thought process that gets in the way of you feeling joy and hope?
Root Out Your Reasons
Discomfort can express as depression and/or pain. Depression is a hopelessness, or a feeling that nothing is right and likely will not be right again. Depression is an isolation—from self or others. It is feeling all alone and stuck. Depression can trigger as physical pain and certainly, pain can trigger depression. Depression that is life-long involves both the root and crown chakras—root being about family of origin, who the world expects you to be and outside perceived limits, as well as the higher purpose and direction of your life.
Even temporary depression or situational depression is far more prevalent this year. Our routines, our lives, our occupations/jobs and our plans have been disrupted. Even our ability to be with loved ones has been affected.
What do you know about your patterns around feeling stuck, alone and helpless?
What are you feeling about the state of the world and your part or place in it?
How have your plans, whether they be work, school, or travel been impacted this year?
What about the lack of normal celebrations, such as weddings, graduations, birthdays and funerals?
Feel Your Feels
In the first stage of embracing your discomfort, it is more important to FEEL what is happening than to FIX what is happening. If you don’t know how you feel, it tends to get swept under the rug and ignored. Self-soothing is a way to keep going without addressing the discomfort. For some it may be too much TV or computer time, or even inappropriate activities such as porn or gambling.
Coping mechanisms are not all beneficial. A coping mechanism is something that literally helps you cope. It doesn’t necessarily help you heal. Many times it acts as a band-aid to the wound. What I know from years of working with clients energetically is that when we “make do” with a behavior that doesn’t acknowledge the feelings we’re having (other than to try and deaden the feelings), they will likely come back stronger in the next situation where we feel discomfort.
Discomfort can also express as a need to avoid or run away from the feelings that are uncomfortable. Our emotions are governed in large part by the sacral chakra, which holds our relationships and connections, which for some people are currently almost non-existent. Many people respond with a perceived need to do more: work more – eat more – sleep more. Energetically this “doing more” is a solar plexus chakra imbalance that we treat through doing everything BUT feeling. Each of our chakras can attempt to help us compensate when we avoid doing what we should be doing in discomfort – sitting with our feelings. I’ve mentioned the primary ones to help you notice what your compensations may be.
Sit, Stay with Discomfort
Healing is a process. It can be instantaneous, but more often involves sitting in the discomfort to really know it.
What do I feel and what am I telling myself about how I feel?
About how I cope? (Is fear driving me to “do” so I don’t feel?)
About how I will survive this and who I will be on the other side of this isolation?
Do I take my feelings out on myself?
Can I share my feelings with another?
Healing does not mean that we are meant to do this alone. Right now we need connection more than ever. If you don’t have someone you can share with, mutually hold space with, please seek out therapy.
Get Centered and Grounded
It is important to be centered and grounded to face our inner truths. This gives us a stable and balanced place to start acknowledging our discomfort. This month I’m sharing links to two guided meditations I created with the artwork of my friend Kearsty Bogenrief to help you center and to ground.
With practice, you will begin to find the space within to feel all of what is getting triggered. In sitting with your discomfort for a time, you can gain insight as to its purpose or its lack of truth for you. From here you can begin to shift into the new you.
Shift into the New You
I say “new you” because none of us can go completely back to where we were. As the world changes, we change. If you can envision a better you—more resilient, more honest and authentic—you can step into a different world view. One that supports who we must become as global partners in this world.
May patience be with you over this next month as you acknowledge discomfort and honor it as part of your healing journey!
